Unravelling My PAth

We each all have our own path to thread..

"How did I get from there to here in such short a time?"

I found myself instinctively mouthing this question as my face lay buried in the lushness of my freshly laundered towel. Something about the scent of this morning brought me back to a world of childhood nostalgia both sweet with the memory that I once was a little girl and bitter wth the reality that I did not enjoy the all of it.

Nevertheless, I have given up on bitterness a lifetime ago and so today I am left with a sephia laced memory of days gone by with laughter given and roads taken.

Something about roads and paths and trails perpetually intrigue me.

I know why.

As a child we would often summer off to this private Batangas beach owned by an Uncle. I love and adore that place. From the main highway going past savannah looking fields of sun baked over grown field grass (almost tall as a man) an impetous right turn to a barely conceivable track of dirt road ushered a world of wonder for the 13 year old me.

Bumps and grinds and shoves along the rcoky path colored my imagination of being in Africa. ...so much so that I half expected a wild eyed zebra to emerge from hiding and block our path...
I remember the moment..yes I do.

I was seated left window side ( this is important to note because window side was a much coveted place at that time) of the vehicle deep in my Africa reverie when my eye caught a glimpse of it..

Ooooh'...I looked again...peering deeply through the sweeping curtain of brown wild grass that blocked my view..Could it be?..Could it be?...Yes..yes..it is!

Blue blue blue peeping through nature's veil!

A blue as pure as twin flames arising!...A blue as beautiful as the lost mystical pearl of the South Seas!..A blue pearl of ocean enticing...My heart skipped a beat and I felt at that precise moment how it was to pine for true love...

Another wicked wild lurch that almost sent me reeling followed by an ungraceful skid of turn ... and then I gaaaasped!.

Before me in full view was my love...My ocean...my wonder...stretched with arms open wide..Come to me...Come to me...Come to me it enticed!

Our ride brought us further hilltop...up a winding brown dusty path bordred by gigantic ancient fairy trees that seemed to tease my view of the handsome hue. Then round and down once more we circled until at long last we settled on a wide expanse of field with its golden powdered edges licking the rim of my ocean...

As if to add glitter to all my eyes could take...the house...majestic, grandly rustic and proud stood at the end of the rough roaded path our vehicles bravely trudged....Smiling for me it was...daring me to be...to think..to realize..to unravel...

I could not contain myself....Were I in the position to do as I pleased at that moment I would have laughed in pleasure...I would have kicked off my white blue striped sneakers, flung off my shirt, wiggled off my denims, and ran ran raaaaaan wth all the recklessness in this world...arms flailing...outstretched... bereft of sadness, doubt, guilt or care!!!

Reality though was that I just stood there..out of the car..staring at it all with a weaved picnic basket on hand...I must have been frozen for a moment because the next I heard was an admonishment from someone to hurry up...Lunch to prep.

So my eyes reluctantly left its gaze to face the moment of practicality of being thirteen...Of food and plates and bags to carry in...but not before...just not before my eyes caught sight of a hint of a footpath leading up into the hill alongside the beach...

And there my faint smile revived....

A path.... a path a secret path...Isn't that a secret path??...

Oh' yes it is...

My own very own path...for later to discover...

I whispered to no one but me...and the warm ocean breeze.